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Hetty Alice McClave

10/28/1923 - 3/10/2019

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Obituary For Hetty Alice McClave

One of the Greatest People of the Greatest Generation, Hetty A. McClave, passed away Saturday, March 10, 2019, at Carriage House in Steubenville at the age of 95. Hetty was born October 28, 1923, in Uhrichsville, Ohio, to the late Thomas I. and Celia Joach White. She attended Uhrichsville High School, where she was the editor of the yearbook and the first Homecoming Queen (an honor of which she was very proud). Hetty attended Ohio University for a year, before marrying her high school sweetheart, Bud McClave, on February 19, 1944. Shortly after their marriage, Bud was off to join our forces in WWII, while Hetty joined those stateside assisting our troops. When Bud returned after the War, Hetty’s life changed dramatically. Within the next eight years three children joined the McClave family: Jim, Barb and Di. While Bud completed his college education and began his role in running the family business, Hetty became a full-time Mom. As her children learned over the years, when Mom decided to do something, she didn’t accept anything other than being the best. She also demanded the same of her kids – if you’re going to attempt something, strive to be the best. She set a number of wonderful examples: the best three-week summer vacations in a station wagon going all over our country; the best Christmas celebrations with the kids decorating the trees, carols and hot chocolate on Christmas eve, and wonderful surprises Christmas morning; the best family dinners at six every night; the best Friday night tradition of very buttered popcorn and Coke while watching the favorite family TV shows; and the best dinner-out treats at Coe’s restaurant. Hetty was also an avid golfer, having a group of close friends who played together. As in everything else, she was determined to excel; she and her golfing buddies had loads of fun over the years. Hetty knew no strangers. When meeting others, the conversation was always more about them than her. She cared about others and showed it with no pretense. Hetty made the world a better place through her caring, supportive, and optimistic approach to life and all those around her. Hetty is survived by her son, Jim (Mary Jay) McClave of Gainesville, FL; her daughter, Barb (Bill) Ware of Burlington, NC; her son-in-law, Charlie Whiston of Wilmington, NC (formerly of Kennebunkport, ME); grandchildren, “Joey” (Jeff) Furlow, Will (Amber) McClave, Kristin (Case) Hill, Jamie (Geno Rubeis) Baldwin, Michael Whiston, Laura Whiston, Anna Whiston; great-grandchildren, Caryss Baldwin, Celia Furlow, Jake and Luke McClave, Zach and Beckett Baldwin, Nicholas Hill; step-grandchildren, Emily (Chris) Baldwin, Matt Ware, Erin Kays; step-great-grandchildren, Alex and Erica Driver, Andrew Kays, and Evan DeMarr. Hetty was predeceased by her husband, Bud, having celebrated over 70 years of marriage together, her daughter, Dianne McClave and granddaughter, Amy Whiston. Hetty’s family is grateful for the wonderful care she received at Steubenville’s Carriage House over the last four-plus years of her life. Roberta Smith of Carriage House was so dear to and beloved by Hetty, which gave us great peace of mind. The family is so grateful for the loving friendship of Ray Scurry, who began as a driver for Bud and Hetty in 2013 and became their friend and angel. We couldn’t have done this without you, Ray and Roberta…you were blessings to Mom and you both will forever be part of our family. Services will be held at the Dunlope-Shorac Funeral Home, 215 Fernwood Road, Wintersville, Ohio on Saturday, March 23. Visitation will be held at 10 am, with the service immediately following at 11 am. Following burial at Fort Steuben Burial Estates, a lunch reception will be held at Shorac Family Center, across the street from the funeral home. In lieu of flowers, the family asks that donations be sent to JDRF, 26 Broadway, New York, NY 10004 or National MS Society, P.O. Box 4527 New York, NY 10163.

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  • 09/03/2024

    Nick and Jane Kaschak

    We will miss our friend and neighbor so much! We were certainly lucky to have her and Bud next door for 20+years. We learned many life lessons and share many laughs with them over the years. "It's ok to be in your PJ's at 7pm" among them. Only with Hetty would I ever share my boyfriend💙 Her generous heart, hugs, humor and wisdom were an irreplaceable gift to Nick and I. Love to the whole McClave family for sharing her with us. Love, Nick and Jane

  • 09/03/2024

    Jeff Furlow

    I tried to light a candle but they didn't have one with The Pittsburgh Steelers' logo on it.

  • 09/03/2024

    charles whiston

    Now home after our Steubenville gathering in your honor and memory.  You and Dad welcomed me with open arms years ago, always embracing those with whom paths would cross.  You came to Maine often and played with the grandchildren, worked on projects around the house, shared stories..... and played with the grandchildren some more !   Much I have learned from you and the McClave family, look carefully and kindly as to who is in your midst, ask of their story and share your own.  A better world is the result and you have proven that in your years.  Love is the bond we shared..     Charlie

  • 09/03/2024

    Will McClave

    As Hetty's (I've called her "Mo" since I can remember) grandson I had a wonderful relationship with this great woman.  From my earliest days I remember mainly one thing....laughter.  Her love and appreciation for the positive and fun things in life were infectious.  She always provided me attention, encouragement and yes...some lighthearted grief as well! 🙂  We bonded over so many things...golf, sports, family and in-general life experiences.  It wasn't till very late in our relationship that I got know her on a different level.  I was on a business trip in Ohio and had a chance to visit, Bud ("Po" to me) was in the hospital at the time and I wanted to see him.  Well after some great time together with Po, Mo made it very clear that I was not only in town to see just him!  And that we were going to dinner together so she gets her time as well 🙂  During that dinner I had the wonderful opportunity to ask her questions about their life together...I learned about war time, I learned about the bowling alley, I learned about her introduction to golf, I learned more about Gram White (my great grandmother - who I knew as a child -  and Mo's mom). It was really the first "adult" conversation I had with Mo, one in which she didn't just dote on me or we didn't tease each other - a conversation I will never forget.  And of course I will never forget Mo, and the laughter, and the unwavering support she provided.  I love you Mo.  I am so glad you and Po are together again, laughing and looking over our families.

  • 09/03/2024

    Valerie Truini

    Family of Hetty so sorry for your loss please know you're in my thoughts and prayers and pray that God will help you through this difficult time enjoyed waiting on Hetty and Bud through the years at Bob Evans I'm a server Valerie she will be truly missed

  • 09/03/2024

    Mary Jay McClave

    I have had the great honor to be Hetty's daughter-in-law for 52 years, and she showed me how it was done by her example of love, acceptance and support for all those years. She continues to be an example of how to conduct a life well lived. We spent many a summer vacation at her and Bud's home.....at least it was a vacation for two impecunious married folk with kids...lots of bridge games, red fingers from the dye on pistachios, wonderful golf with her special ladies, a few adult beverages...mainly IC Lights! Good times, prescious memories...and I'm pretty sure Het has scooted Jesus down a chair, so she can sit at the right hand of God, and give instructions on the Hetty McClave Method of Domestic Engineering, 'cause the good Lord knows, you could have eaten off her kitchen floor it was that clean! So, dear Mo, Godspeed to your final resting place, love you so much...even if I am a flaming liberal and you are a Reagan republican, which just goes to show, sometimes opposites attract and make a bond that even death cannot break!MJ

  • 09/03/2024

    Roberta Smith

  • 09/03/2024

    Roberta Smith

    Hetty loved her family first of all and life as it was at Carriage House,she cherished going out with her girl friends and her trips out with Ray very thankful for everything anyone had done for her she had a positive out look she was heart broken worried and nervous when any family member was going through difficult times her six sense was right on point she loved hugs and thought everyone should have them Momma Het is free to do in heaven the things she couldn't do here I will love and miss her forever.

  • 09/03/2024

    Emily Baldwin

    Loss of a very strong woman who seemed to be determined up to the end....much like her daughter, my stepmom. Love to Barbara and my Dad and the whole family mourning her passing.

  • 09/03/2024

    Debbie Brown Nungesser

    Aunt Hetty ..... truly one of of a kind!  She always made me laugh with her sarcastic wit!!  I loved to see her and mom together, reliving their high school days...even at 90 harmonizing to an old glee club song 🙂  My sympathies go out to the whole family.  She will be so missed.  Love to all.

  • 09/03/2024

    Barbara Ware-Levensen

    The first time I met you was a Christmas Holiday; you made me feel good about myself. I still have the lovely sweater that you made for me.I also was with you at both Kristin's and Joey's weddings; I have pictures of both occasions... Love Always,Barby

  • 09/03/2024

    todd mcclave

    I am proud and comforted by being able to say that she was MY Aunt. To remember the love, kindness and encouragement she gave me throughout my life is so meaningful because Aunt Hetty was a lady of great intelligence and integrity. My thoughts go to the time I spent with Bud and Hetty and it is comforting. The memories are about laughing and talking and feeling really good when I left. Bud and I shared a passion for our work and Aunt Hetty encouraged and enjoyed joining our discussions about the plant. Like all of us her roots ran deep in the clay as her Dad ran a plant too. Another blessing that came to me  from Aunt Hetty was my relationship with her mother,  "Gramma White". Celia had the same strength, integrity, intelligence and kindness as her daughter. When I was a growing boy I would ride my bike up Dawson Street and Gramma White would be sitting on her porch. I would stop and talk and pretty soon she would be feeding me. She was great cook! Last night I was at my mothers and talked to Carol Ong who is taking care of our mother. Carol was very emotional talking about Hetty. Carol cared for Celia for 10 years and formed a special relationship with Hetty and Celia. These three strong women, each about 20 years apart in age, formed a loving relationship that Carol cherishes.Thank you Aunt Hetty for being such a special Aunt, and Bud for being such a great Uncle to me. And thank you Jim, Barb and Di for being a part of our wonderful family. You are the product of two of my favorite people. I love all of you. Todd

  • 09/03/2024

    Sue A Bird

    Remembering Aunt Hetty just makes me smile.   She was SUCH a "character" (and I mean that in the most endearing sense of the word!)   Her sharp wit, her love of life, her infectious laugh, her funny stories, her recall and retelling of crazy childhood memories, I could go on and on.............. whenever I was with her, it was FUN!  We laughed constantly!  And, of course, I was her "favorite"! (Yes, I know, she told EACH of you the same thing! 🙂   We were all her "dear hearts".   That pretty much sums up Aunt Hetty.........we all loved her because she made EACH of us feel special!   What a gift!   She had a rich, full, beautiful life............and she made a difference!!!!  She impacted everyone she met along her journey.   I will be forever grateful that I had a wonderful "Aunt Hetty" in my life!   Thinking of all of her dear family with extra hugs of my deepest sympathy and supporting and caring for you in your sadness.   Warmly and fondly, Sue Brown Bird

  • 09/03/2024

    Sue A Bird

    To my lifelong dearest friend and sister-in-law.  How many people can say they celebrated both their 10th and 90th birthdays together?   We shared an incredible journey...........always claiming to be the cutest, smartest, and most fun girls graduating from Uhrichsville High School back in our day! ( and yes, our families say that is totally a figment of our imaginations.........but we both know that we were "legends in our own minds"!)   Whether giggling and laughing together, sharing adventures, being on the Homecoming Court, raising our families, golfing, bowling, visiting each other in Leroy or Wintersville....we shared a bond that was extra special!   You made my life more colorful and memorable by being an enduring presence in it........thanks for the memories, dear Het!   Your friend,  Ann McClave Brown  (written by my daughter Sue, as my mind is failing me, but my daughters know how special you are to me!)

  • 09/03/2024

    Catina

    You will forever be in my Heart💖I miss singing in the Dining Room after dinner and tucking you in for the night. You always brought a smile to my face Love you always😘😘💖💖

  • 09/03/2024

    Matt

    Hetty McClave- I will miss your warm greetings, your generous spirit, your devoted interest in others.  You had such an amazing way of treating others in a way as if you had been best of friends or family forever.  I will remember you for the big hugs and a spontaneous smile when we'd meet, and for the way you treated me as one of your tribe, genuinely, regardless of if it was deserved.  I have learned some great things through knowing you in your life, and perhaps most importantly in your passing. So many wishes for your peace and for your amazing family.  Thank you for you.  When I see you next time, I will have many things to say I wish I'd said before.  So glad to have known you.With much love, Matt

  • 09/03/2024

    Barb

    I miss you so much, my dearest Mama...with so very much love and many tears...

  • 09/03/2024

    Erin

  • 09/03/2024

    Erin

  • 09/03/2024

    Shelley Weir

  • 09/03/2024

    Shelley Weir

    Aunt Het - I will miss you so much! When mom passed you opened your heart to me. I will miss that infectious laugh and smile of yours! I love you!     Shelley

  • 09/03/2024

    Cathy McClave Trustdorf

    Dear Barb and Jim, my deepest condolences to you on losing your sweet, funny, and insightful mom and to your kids and grandkids for losing their Grandma. It is hard for me to believe Aunt Hetty is gone-I've always felt she was only a phone call away. She always made me feel special and loved. The last time I talked to her she said "Cath, is that you?" She still recognized my voice! And she always made me laugh with a funny story or sarcastic comment! Rest peacefully Aunt Hetty. You will always be in my heart and my memories will keep me smiling.

  • 09/03/2024

    Mag Mitchell

    I am thinking of you, Het, and remember you so often! You will never be forgotten, as you were a very important person in my life.Mag Mitchell

  • 09/03/2024

    Mag Mitchell

    Mag (Miner) Mitchell My dearest Het, you were like another mother to me for as far back as I remember. Your humor was the best!  We all loved our pet dogs, our wonderful woods, behind our houses, and were content to walk with friends and our beloved pets even in the woods! These pets had no leashes, ran the neighborhood, and we kids were safe on our lovely streets we walked so often. I still remember all the names of the plants and trees in our woodsy neighborhood, and know it's because of the freedom to be outside whatever the weather! We even rode our sleds "down the back road", right by your house, with the big boys crashing at the bottom of the hill tumbling off the wrecked "trains". You were always there with a smile when we surprised you and Bud for a visit, and we knew you were there waiting to greet us every time! We went to Merrills' Beach on Lake Erie, near Geneva on the Lake, for family vacations during the summer, and had a great time, sharing the making and clean up of dinner often too. I can still picture our hot dogs roasting on a beach campfire, along with Barb and I throwing my rubber Lucy doll into the waves, and having Jim go in after her! I still love the beach to this day and feel so happy there, always searching for shells or sea beans washed up. You are an inspiration to me now that we are grandparents, to be a good mother, grandma and friend, and take care of myself by taking lots of walks. You and Bud were always walking, and I loved how you walked on the outside of the mall! You didn't want to walk inside the mall with other people there!   I always wanted a sister, and so Barb and Di were my sisters for life, and we all loved hanging out at the McClaves' house! I will always love my memories of you, and miss you every day too.  Love, Mag I will continue to remember you on every holiday for sure!

  • 09/03/2024

    Rae

    Dearest, sweetest Hetty.  My other "mom" for 58 years.- Throughout her life, whenever I was lucky enough to see her, she never failed to ask me about my life and family - making me feel so special and loved.  I, too, will miss hearing her say "dear heart" and calling me my special nickname "Raedy".  Love you so much. 

  • 09/03/2024

    Krissie

  • 09/03/2024

    Kristin Hill

    My Meecs,This is way harder than it should be given you lived a long and wonderful life. Instead, I selfishly miss you and wish you were still here. I wish I could hear you say "dear heart" again or hear you laugh. Nicholas said this morning that you were sweet to everyone and like Jo said, you always made us feel special. I am so glad my boy knew you and experienced the love you have for your family. I miss you and my heart brakes for my mama losing her mama.Love you

  • 09/03/2024

    Jeff Furlow

    I was welcomed into your family a little over twenty years ago and have always been grateful for that blessing.  It was because of  you that I have the best wife ever (Joey) and the world's best mother-in-law.  You always had a smile for everyone and now I feel like crap for taking that for granted.  We miss you.

  • 09/03/2024

    Joey

    Meecs,, I miss you.  I hope you and Po are together now.  Thanks for being a great 'grandma', and a great 'great grandma' too.  I'm so glad my Celia got to know the daughter of Celia Joach.  Thanks for always making me feel special.

  • 09/03/2024

    Bill

    Been my "Mom" for almost 30 years... Always wanted to know "how is everyone," and then would start going through the family, name by name... right up to the end... 

  • 09/03/2024

    Don & Dianna Vandeborne

    So sorry for your loss. She was an angel on earth. Always kind and asked how you were doing. She touched so many lives and will be missed by many. I'm sure she is in a better place and at peace. 🙏🙏

  • 09/03/2024

    Barb

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